David A. Bednar , Eternal Marriage
4 min read
Imagine sitting in the living room of an apostle and his wife as they share the most real and touching moments of their life together.
“ఐడహోలోని రెక్స్బర్గ్లో జరిగిన ఒక ప్రత్యేక ఆరాధన కార్యక్రమంలో క్వోరమ్ ఆఫ్ ది ట్వెల్వ్ అపోస్టల్కు చెందిన ఎల్డర్ డేవిడ్ ఎ. బెడ్నార్ మరియు ఆయన భార్య సుసాన్ బెడ్నార్ల ప్రసంగాన్ని వింటున్నప్పుడు బివైయు–ఐడహో విద్యార్థులు ఈ విధంగా భావించారు.”
Just a week before celebrating their 50th wedding anniversary , Elder and Sister Bednar didn't give a traditional speech. Instead, they sat side by side and, without scripts or a teleprompter, chatted as if they were among friends.
Amid laughter, memories, and profound lessons, they shared a truth that left a mark on all attendees:
“You don’t find the marriage you want. You create it.”
It's not luck, it's a decision
In a world where many fear heartbreak and seek the “perfect person,” Elder Bednar made it clear that a happy marriage is not a matter of luck, but of daily effort.
“People talk about finding the right person. I think that’s a mistake. You don’t find the marriage you want, you create it ,” she stated with conviction.
The apostle taught that it is not necessary to wait for everything to be perfect to take the next step, but that the growth and strength of marriage come with time and mutual commitment.
“Our experience is that if we do the right thing for the right reasons at the right time, things will work out,” he added.
This message touched the heart of Savannah Cordray, a committed student preparing for marriage. “It reminded me that I don’t need to be afraid. When difficulties arise, I can turn to the Savior. He is the firm foundation upon which a marriage can be built ,” she shared.
The trick? Enjoy the simple things.
Far from grand romantic gestures, the Bednars emphasized that small things strengthen a relationship. One example? An old Scrabble game they received as a wedding gift.
Instead of competing, they work together to use all the letters, especially when they have differences.
“That game helps us put aside our troubles and remember what really matters,” Sister Bednar explained with a smile.
Elder Bednar also emphasized that simple things have lasting power.
“We often forget how important it is to look each other in the eye, listen attentively, and pray together. These small things, when done consistently, create something great,” she said.
When God's plan is better than yours
Throughout their life together, Elder and Sister Bednar have learned to trust in the Lord, even when the future is uncertain.
“If we follow Christ, we will be where we need to be and doing what He wants us to do,” Elder Bednar said.
He also reminded everyone that sometimes the path is not immediately clear, but the Lord guides our steps little by little.
“You won’t always have a detailed map of the future, but if you are faithful, the Lord will guide you step by step,” he advised.
That teaching resonated with Cordray, who admitted to being someone who always wants to be in control. But after listening to the Bednars, he said, “Now I want to surrender more of ‘my plan’ to the Lord and trust in what He has in store for me.”
A message for you
If you have ever felt afraid of not finding the right person or doubted whether a happy marriage is possible, remember the words of Elder Bednar:
“A strong marriage is not about finding the perfect person, but about being the right person and creating together the relationship you want.”
What small actions can you take today to strengthen your relationships? Tell us in the comments!
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